I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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