You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I yelled at your uterus for you.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
