i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize