He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
try to milk me bitch
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