you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
