Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize