just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
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