we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize
