In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
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when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
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he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.