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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (651): View more from Minnesota

  pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (917): View more from New York City

  When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS

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