I just saw a hot homeless man
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize