Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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