What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
