oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
