so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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