i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
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