I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize