Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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