I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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