You're a womanizer and a bitch.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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