i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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