Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
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