At least make sure they are 18
Why
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
