Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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