I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
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Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize