ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
