is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
i think i just lost a toe
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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