he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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