Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
