Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
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