I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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