The maid of honor just puked.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
