It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
why is half of my head shaved?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize