What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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