So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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