But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
