forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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