Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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