During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
we're making bets on your personal life
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize