Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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