wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
