He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
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You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
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i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize