it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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