well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize