I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
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