i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
