Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize