Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
did you just send me my own nude
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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