he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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