using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
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He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
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