its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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